Monday, December 16, 2013

Saying goodbye to my furry little friend

I am totally heartbroken. The little guy that I have come to love for the past few months is gone. I will probably never see him again. He is no longer around to greet me when I visit, wagging his tail, jumping on me, and being so thrilled to see me. I will never be able to spoil him again, buying him treats that he loves so much that make him so happy. I will never be able to take him to his favorite spots, the dog parks and the dog beach, again. I will never be able to see him grow up to be the brave hunting dog that he was born to be…. Brownie is gone.

I miss his puppy smell…I miss the way he asks me for a belly rub all the time. I miss his cute furry paws, his ears (one floppier than the other), his cute face full of expressions..I even miss the way he growls at me from time to time when I try to pick him up when he doesn’t want to be picked up. I just miss him so much. The pic below is him asking me for a belly rub when he was visiting my place waiting for C to pick him up.

 Just look at the excitement on his face during the car ride. Every time I went to go pick him up, he got so excited. He knew he was going to be taken somewhere fun.
This past weekend, my friend C (Brownie’s owner), was left with the difficult decision to give Brownie away due to so and so circumstances. I was so saddened when I heard about this. C had very little choice and found it to be in Brownie’s best interest. I would have totally taken Brownie, but it would have been difficult for me to raise Brownie too. Brownie would be stuck at home all day by himself, no one to play with him, to walk him, and give him the attention he needs and deserves. Jindos need plenty of space, mental stimulation, and exercise. They can grow to be wild and difficult to raise without the proper environment and care.
Brownie is in a much better place now. He went to go live on a farm….kind of reminds me of how on television sitcoms and movies, parents tell the kids that the family dog went to go live on a farm when in reality, the dog passed away. Well, in this case, Brownie actually did go to the farm to his newfound life. He is now living with a retired couple who are able to stay with him all day long. There is plenty of space for him to roam around, develop his innate hunting skills, chase little rodents, and become the hunting dog that he was meant to be….It’s the perfect environment for Brownie. But that doesn’t stop the pain of missing him so much.

I heard that previous owners (especially the first ones) are not supposed to see the dog after giving them away. Otherwise, the dog will go into depression, supposedly. I am not even Brownie’s owner, but loved him just as much. And if I ever do want to see Brownie, I would have to probably go with C since I don’t even know how to get to the farm. And it is two hours away. But I wonder if seeing me without C would be harmless. He knows that I am not his owner. To Brownie, I am probably just the nice lady that visits here and there to spoil him….I am just a visitor to him, so hmm….could seeing me without C be okay?

Remembering Brownie
Brownie is just a memory now. We have had some good times. C used to bitch about how I spoil Brownie too much, turning him into a prissy dog. But I couldn’t help it. He was just so adorable.

The last day with Brownie, C and I took him to Top Dog Barkery. At the time I didn’t even know that this was going to be the last day of seeing Brownie. Fucking C told me the next day that Brownie found a new home. I knew it was happening, as C has talked about the matter with me before (sometimes I wanted to think it was a joke out of frustration), but had no idea that it was going to be happening so soon.  
Anyways, I’m glad my last day with Brownie was memorable and he got to go to one of his favorite places. At Top Dog Barkery, we bought him a Santa hat and cute little holiday treats. Brownie absolutely LOVES coming here. And now, I will never be able to bring him here again!



I remember the last time I was heartbroken about a dog. It was over my little Chihuahua, Prince Charming. I was like 16 or 17 at the time. I loved Prince Charming so much. He was always there to greet me when I came home from school. And one day, when I came home, I realized that something felt different. I realized that I wasn’t greeted by Prince Charming with his cute little self running towards me, jumping on me, kissing me. And I go to find out that he was hit by a car and died. It was the fault of our housekeeper at the time. Her name was Susanna. She was BL’s (the super-cool nanny/housekeeper) replacement. When BL left after six years of being with us, Susanna came to live with us. My siblings and I never warmed up to her. Her cooking sucked, she did not keep the house clean,…and we didn’t like her. She used to make such nasty disgusting meals that we couldn't even eat. My mom (who can't cook to save her life) would have to make dinner after a long day at work because the woman we hired to cook for us could not cook. The house would be a mess too...dusty and dirty. She shrank a good number of items while doing laundry, ruined my parents imported blanket, and caused a bunch of other disasters. Other than for housekeeping duties, she was mainly there as a nanny for my youngest brother, but she barely took care of him. She watched TV all day, slept, ate, shitted. She must have thought she was getting paid to lounge around or something. Anyways, she used to always keep the screen door open for some reason. I remember always telling her to keep it closed since flies come in and the dog will run out. But I would always find her having the door open. And apparently, when no one was home, the screen door was always open. Prince Charming paid the cost for her carelessness.

Susanna only stayed with us for about three months or so. I never even really talked to or interacted with her much until that day…..and the things I said to her that day were anything but pleasant. I pretty much just cursed her out in whatever words I knew in Spanish. I was so pissed off at her. When she went outside, I locked her out and did not let her in. She wasn't able to get inside until my parents came home. I wanted to slap her. That night, she packed her bags and left. And that was the last we saw of her. Thank goodness.

Prince Charming was only two or three months when he died. I can still remember not going to school the next day….was in bed all day crying my eyes out and wasn’t even able to eat.

But at least I can find peace in knowing that Brownie is still alive and in a very happy place. I have more pics of cute little Brownie on Instagram!


  1. I bet you Brownie misses you and will remember you. I just replied to your comment on my blog but here's the video that I was talking about. It's Christian the Lion - he was being sold I think at Harrods. He was adopted by two guys and they raised him until he got to be too big. They took Christian back to Africa or something so that he could grow up there. The guys went back some time later and the ending is seriously so amazing.

    Makes me bawl every time b/c it makes you realize how strong the bond is b/w an animal and human.

    So don't feel sad. Brownie is living in a rad home right now on a farm. And I promise you he will remember you if you guys should ever meet again.

    1. Thanks for sharing the video and the kind words. The video is amazing.

      I never realized how much care a dog really needs. When I was growing up, I always had a dog(s) But there was always someone home to feed them, play with them, pay attention to them, etc. They had other dogs to play with as well...but leaving a dog home alone would be torture for a dog, especially to a breed like the Jindo. When Brownie is left home alone for even an hour, he goes crazy...he cries and he tears up the entire place. And neither of us have a backyard for him to roam around in. All my dogs that I've had lived in the backyard (except when they were babies) because my parents didn't want them inside. We had a Jindo before too....came to live with our Chihuahua that we already had at the time. The Chihuahua (feisty and mean) always attacked the Jindo. And the Jindo used to always try to make babies with the Chihuahua lol. It was the funniest thing because the Chihuahua was the size of the Jindo's head and he can never reach. But that would have been an interesting breed because I love both.

      It's been four days since I've seen Brownie. And I miss him sooo much. I hear Brownie has a new baby sister too...a little baby girl puppy they found that was lost with no name tag. The couple adopted her as well.

  2. Of course it took me a while of reading to realize he was still well, just not with you. But I've had many dogs (and cats) in my lifetime, some passed away, some prematurely and some I had to find homes for. All those experiences are equally hard to deal with. So I feel the pain Missy believe me.
    On a not so lighter note, try giving away THESE babies--talk about becoming attached!

    1. Yeah I've had many dogs in my lifetime too. But I think the two that I've mentioned had to be the hardest. I think it's especially hard because they were both babies when I said goodbye. It made me so sad that I wouldn't be able to see them grow up.

      Cute pups. Were they yours?

    2. Yes one of Sassy's litters--she died at age 11. Hard to believe that pic is 10 years old--the second pup from the left was shikira--we kept that one and renamed her Isis-- shes now 10. Great dog, but also getting up there.

  3. Aww what a cutie pie! Even though you girls gonna miss him a lot, I think your friend made a very smart decision since she will be unable to care for him in the future. It is also very unselfish and look on the brighter side, Brownie will be happy on the farm!

    1. Thanks. It's been a week and I can just imagine how much bigger he has grown. He gets bigger each time I see him. But yeah, I am happy for the little guy that he can be with people that have the leisure to be with him all day. He is probably having a blast running around in the fields, chasing after little animals and such.


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