My scars didn’t really bother me so much. But lately, I have been getting weird looks by strangers when they see my arms. Friends have told me that if they didn’t know me, they would think that I was one of those EMO suicidal girls or a heroin addict lol. When I pass through the drive-thru to pick up food or coffee, and I stick out my left arm (the arm with the most scars), it seems like they glance at my arm, then at me, and I can only imagine what is going through their heads. The other night when I was picking up Jack-in-the-box through the drive-thru late at night after work, the lady at the window asked me (with a concerned look on her face), “Is everything okay tonight?” The way she asked me was in a tone that one would probably ask a woman who just gotten brutally beat up in a nasty case of domestic violence or something.
A friend of mine joked that when we go out in public, people are going to think that he beat me lol. Well..maybe he wasn’t joking. Some people may probably really be quick to judge and assume such things. And who can blame them? The scars do look quite conspicuous.My scars are mainly burns that I have accumulated in the professional kitchen. Burns and cuts seem to be the most common injury in this industry. When I was a newbie, I used to get a cut at least once a week. And cuts sting like crazy. The scars from my cuts have all healed. Thank goodness most of them were very minor. But on my left thumb, I still have this scar from the biggest, most painful cut I have ever gotten in my entire life. I was cutting a carrot. The carrot slipped, and the knife blade slipped into my thumb. And it wouldn’t stop bleeding. The cut was so deep, I was about to go to ER. But apparently, people don’t go to the ER for cuts unless something needed to be sewn back on. And it wasn’t like my thumb was cut and hanging off or anything. It was just an insanely deep cut. And I swear….ever since that incident, I have never ever gotten another cut again..EVER! This nasty pic (below) is about a couple weeks into getting the cut. You can barely see the scar anymore unless you look really closely.
But I still get the occasional burn. I figure, I think I need to get one huge traumatic burn for me to stop getting any more burns altogether. The thing is, I am not clumsy, but I am kind of hypersensitive. I get startled very easily. Most of my burns are from hot sheet pans. When I get a mild or sudden distraction, my flow of movement is disrupted. I’ve gotten better about getting less burns these days though. Also, being pale doesn’t help. I get bright red when being anywhere near the burners or ovens (though that is temporary). I love having pale skin, but this is one thing I don’t like about it. Pale skin seems to be more soft and smooth, but also more susceptible to scars. I even get bruises so easily too. Half the time I will find a bruise on my body and won’t have any idea how I got it. I mean, it doesn’t happen regularly…otherwise I’d go see a doctor about it. But every once in a while when I do notice a bruise or two, I know I did something to get bruised, but can’t always point my finger on what.